Growing into your highest self means that you may have to experience a lot of pain to get there, and often times it is the most painful experiences that empower us to grow into our highest selves.
Many times we don't want to get over all of the pain that we have been through, because doing so requires that we leave all of the feelings that require us to face life now behind, so that we can continue to grow in our lives.
One thing that we have to remember about life is that if you stop allowing yourself to grow, then you are slowly just dying.
When you aren't living a full life there is no middle ground and there is no in-between.
It isn't necessary to never remember what you have been through, but it is necessary to take what you have been through, and use those experiences to grow into where you want to go.
Often it's the deepest pain which empowers you to grow into your highest self.